Jessica, in the other draft, was the trouble-maker sister. The one that really needed someone to look after her. She was the punk kid who had nothing going for her except her boyfriend who was trying things no good boy would do.
Now, she is more like her sister than either one would ever admit, even though they are very different. She is athletic but in a different way than her sister. Instead of being ballerina thin and being able to practically double jump in the air like Angela, she plays softball--shortstop--and is willing to tackle someone to get the football or dig for the volleyball. She isn't scared of bruises, "Bruises show the adventure." She is sarcastic and very good with words. She doesn't need long sentences to get her point across, short precise answers are her forte, and causes her sister to be easily blundered.
Her build is more broad than Angela's, people aren't scared of breaking her with a touch. She is average height with light brown hair that in the summer sun gets natural highlights and it waves, it's neither straight nor curly. Her eyes are dark brown except for a small circle of gold in which her puples would be lost in the brown without it.
Where her sister is a social bug and is constantly buzzing with friends, Jesse is a scholar. She prefers coming to the library and finding something new in the non-fiction section or curling up at home in her room with a classic or new fantasy adventure. The new books that most teenagers like to read she finds boring and dully repetitive. Her closest friends are the librarians--Angela's best friend happens to be one of them and is so much nicer than her sister.
With having so few friends life can be pretty lonely and with her sister constantly picking on her all the time and sometimes forgetting her--a slip up in her motherliness--it makes it even worse. Jesse is on a softball team, but none of the other girls really like her and she can't figure out why--because they are jealous and are ostracizing her (they did just come out of Jr. High schools). She may have a friend here or there in a class but only when there isn't anyone else for them to hang out with. So, when Cole comes along one rainy day when she is walking home from school, she doesn't quiet know what to do and goes a long with him. And as he interacts with her she starts to have a crush on him, however, she is hesitant because all everyone else seems to do it torment her. She is right to do so, but her walls start coming down. After he hurts her so badly her walls are reinforced fifty fold and will take a lot to get to come down.
After being hurt by Cole and threatened by Greg (Ehehehehehehehehehehehe!!!) she meets Airo. Oh, Airo. He saves her and runs away. She calls her mom for a ride but then gets hit by a speeder driver. She thinks her mom is dead, although she's really not, and Airo picks her up on the side of the road, she is huddled in a ball miles away from the wreck. And she never really knows what happens to her mother, because Airo takes her away and goes on their own little adventure. In this she also meets Nik who turns her world upside down.
Her Ability is something that I just figured out because of my bestest friend. She can absorb light. You know that kid on Sky High who is like a glow stick? Yeah, it's not like that. She absorbs light and keeps it in her eyes until she needs it--although only holding so much. She can make little light balls say in tunnels or in dark rooms to illuminate her surroundings or say if she gets angry and needs to get away from something she can pulse the light out of her body and blind everyone or cause a huge explosion. She knows something is wrong first when Greg attacks her and then again when she is kidnapped and is completely scared. Awesome!
Ramblings With Faries
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Character Help For Me and My Sake_Angela
So I wanna keep my characters straight. That is an important think to know when writing a story right? Yeah, that's what I thought.
So Angela. At in the first draft, she was the heroine of the story. She was smart, beautiful, athletic, a good flirt. . . She was the girl on campus. But she was humble about it. She practically didn't notice all the other guys practically falling at her feet, that is unless she thought they were something to look at and wanted to date them. She was the girl. The one that every other girl wanted to be. She didn't have any real faults. . . which is my problem.
Now, she has become too motherly. She wants to look out for everyone, but because she only has so many hours in the day she constantly is getting after Cindy and Jessica. She is rather bossy, blunt, and can be very unkind to Jessica and blatantly rude to Cindy--Cindy can't do anything about it because she doesn't know she's being made fun of and has left home to go to college back East. Jessica now gets the full force of it all and hates it. However, when it comes to her friends, Angela is almost an angel. She is always up for giving rides, going out, hanging out, but she wants to be the one in control of the situation. She doesn't like things to surprise her and when they do--because no one can truly control all of their life--she had a melt down. Everything that she did have control over now evaporates in her mind and then because she can't get a hold of herself, things just become worse.
Now, there is a reason why this happens. Her dad, brother, and younger sister were in an accident about a decade before the story starts. Tony was only seven or eight and Jessica was about four, so she doesn't remember this happening. It was a bad accident and totaled the car--Angela's favorite car at the time--sending Tony through one of the windows, because he was playing with Jessica and wasn't sitting right in his seat. He was life-flighted to the closest hospital where he stayed for almost two weeks under careful watch--his head was hit when he landed on a rock outside of the car; the doctors concluded that there was no major damage done but kept him just to be sure and to watch the rest of his injuries which weren't extensive. Angela watched over her brother for as long as her parents would let her--they called it the "twin connection" when really all it was was a need to make sure he, her best friend, was alright. She became very watchful after that until it slowly morphed into being more motherly than normal; then her teenage side kicked in and she became mean about it.
Angela is a very pretty girl, though not drop dead gorgeous as she had been in the first draft. She's on the shorter side of average with fiery, red hair that is extremely curly, her face is still sprinkled with freckles over her button-y nose and gentle cheek bones. Her eyes are also a light caramel brown, almost honey colored. As every teenager, there is still a bit of baby fat still in her cheeks. She hates it, but at least the rest of her baby fat has left her. Now she has a good figure. Her biggest characteristic is her mouth, she loves to talk. In the middle of class especially. Her grades aren't the best because she'd rather be on the phone or Skpe then doing her homework, but she gets fairly decent grades on her tests so her parents don't complain much.
She is also a gymnast. Her height is a bit of an issue because she is just tall enough to be a nusense with her activities. She's grown a few inches in the last few years that has caused her some alarm; if she grows too tall it hurts her ability to compete.
Her Ability is a powerful one. She has the ability to move things with her mind, like Jean Grey in a away. How powerful she, herself, can become is up to her. She can be a rather flighty person when it comes to thinks for herself, and so in disciplining herself to make her Ability powerful is a bit of a challenge. That is until Gabriel tells her that she could use it to defend herself, friends, and children later (at this point she may be on the verge of getting married or having her twin boys, Daniel and Ryan?). After being told that, she really buckles down and gets her head in the game.
Angela and Gabriel have been friends since Angela and Tony were born. Lady Hannah, Gabriel's mother, and Alice Purling. . . I don't remember her name. . . have been friends since they were young girls on Trael (subject to change.). So when Alice had her twins Lady Hannah had to be there and brought her two children, at the time, with her. Gabriel and Angela hit it off first thing. Although he wasn't around much, because he lived on a different planet, they didn't get to see each other very often. But when he did show up, he was ever the gentleman and--although seemed rather odd at times (like not understanding how the TV worked and why they drove cars instead of horses and carriages)--they were always good friends.
The last time Gabriel visited them had been about two years before (right before he got his Knighthood and went off to war). His visit lasted a two weeks, in which Angela had grown a major crush on him. She tried not to let it show, but Gabriel already knew about it and he was okay with it. Nothing was pursued except for one date. It left her happy but a little unsatisfied. Had it really taken him that long to figure out that she was into him? But no, he didn't want to get too into something, especially with such a close friend, if he might not come back. War was a messy business.
So there is Angela, a very quick rundown of her.
So Angela. At in the first draft, she was the heroine of the story. She was smart, beautiful, athletic, a good flirt. . . She was the girl on campus. But she was humble about it. She practically didn't notice all the other guys practically falling at her feet, that is unless she thought they were something to look at and wanted to date them. She was the girl. The one that every other girl wanted to be. She didn't have any real faults. . . which is my problem.
Now, she has become too motherly. She wants to look out for everyone, but because she only has so many hours in the day she constantly is getting after Cindy and Jessica. She is rather bossy, blunt, and can be very unkind to Jessica and blatantly rude to Cindy--Cindy can't do anything about it because she doesn't know she's being made fun of and has left home to go to college back East. Jessica now gets the full force of it all and hates it. However, when it comes to her friends, Angela is almost an angel. She is always up for giving rides, going out, hanging out, but she wants to be the one in control of the situation. She doesn't like things to surprise her and when they do--because no one can truly control all of their life--she had a melt down. Everything that she did have control over now evaporates in her mind and then because she can't get a hold of herself, things just become worse.
Now, there is a reason why this happens. Her dad, brother, and younger sister were in an accident about a decade before the story starts. Tony was only seven or eight and Jessica was about four, so she doesn't remember this happening. It was a bad accident and totaled the car--Angela's favorite car at the time--sending Tony through one of the windows, because he was playing with Jessica and wasn't sitting right in his seat. He was life-flighted to the closest hospital where he stayed for almost two weeks under careful watch--his head was hit when he landed on a rock outside of the car; the doctors concluded that there was no major damage done but kept him just to be sure and to watch the rest of his injuries which weren't extensive. Angela watched over her brother for as long as her parents would let her--they called it the "twin connection" when really all it was was a need to make sure he, her best friend, was alright. She became very watchful after that until it slowly morphed into being more motherly than normal; then her teenage side kicked in and she became mean about it.
Angela is a very pretty girl, though not drop dead gorgeous as she had been in the first draft. She's on the shorter side of average with fiery, red hair that is extremely curly, her face is still sprinkled with freckles over her button-y nose and gentle cheek bones. Her eyes are also a light caramel brown, almost honey colored. As every teenager, there is still a bit of baby fat still in her cheeks. She hates it, but at least the rest of her baby fat has left her. Now she has a good figure. Her biggest characteristic is her mouth, she loves to talk. In the middle of class especially. Her grades aren't the best because she'd rather be on the phone or Skpe then doing her homework, but she gets fairly decent grades on her tests so her parents don't complain much.
She is also a gymnast. Her height is a bit of an issue because she is just tall enough to be a nusense with her activities. She's grown a few inches in the last few years that has caused her some alarm; if she grows too tall it hurts her ability to compete.
Her Ability is a powerful one. She has the ability to move things with her mind, like Jean Grey in a away. How powerful she, herself, can become is up to her. She can be a rather flighty person when it comes to thinks for herself, and so in disciplining herself to make her Ability powerful is a bit of a challenge. That is until Gabriel tells her that she could use it to defend herself, friends, and children later (at this point she may be on the verge of getting married or having her twin boys, Daniel and Ryan?). After being told that, she really buckles down and gets her head in the game.
Angela and Gabriel have been friends since Angela and Tony were born. Lady Hannah, Gabriel's mother, and Alice Purling. . . I don't remember her name. . . have been friends since they were young girls on Trael (subject to change.). So when Alice had her twins Lady Hannah had to be there and brought her two children, at the time, with her. Gabriel and Angela hit it off first thing. Although he wasn't around much, because he lived on a different planet, they didn't get to see each other very often. But when he did show up, he was ever the gentleman and--although seemed rather odd at times (like not understanding how the TV worked and why they drove cars instead of horses and carriages)--they were always good friends.
The last time Gabriel visited them had been about two years before (right before he got his Knighthood and went off to war). His visit lasted a two weeks, in which Angela had grown a major crush on him. She tried not to let it show, but Gabriel already knew about it and he was okay with it. Nothing was pursued except for one date. It left her happy but a little unsatisfied. Had it really taken him that long to figure out that she was into him? But no, he didn't want to get too into something, especially with such a close friend, if he might not come back. War was a messy business.
So there is Angela, a very quick rundown of her.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
After reading something new. . .
So after reading some of Jane Austen's books and discussing them in my class, I've noticed that I'm "recycling" characters and situations. SO, I've had a breakthrough in one of my problems. I know Victoria didn't like Angela at all through Jessica's point of view and it was hard to change from Jesse's POV to get back into Angela's. It was the weirdest thing. But, Angela has been revisited in my mind and--although she was sad and felt neglected and felt treated as if she was the bad guy when she very much isn't--has got her spunk back.
I knew I was missing something from Angela even when I was writing the first draft. She was heroic and happy and charming. . . However, she was missing something called a major flaw. Everyone has them, but I couldn't figure out what her's was. As I wrote Jesse's POV, I found that she was far too motherly. Jesse already had a mom, she didn't need another one. Even after their mom died in Jesse's first draft, Angela was trying to fill that role--which there was now space to fill, Angela felt she was doing the right thing. But even that didn't feel right.
Things have changed. I'm writing it here because I feel no one really ever looks here anymore--it's not like I update things all that often and it's really just been for myself--and it is here because it needs to be written down somewhere and I'd loose it if I actually wrote it down on paper.
Changes:
At least this part seems to flow better. (Not to mention I still get to keep kicking Greg's butt over and over and over and over again. It's kind of awesome!!)
I knew I was missing something from Angela even when I was writing the first draft. She was heroic and happy and charming. . . However, she was missing something called a major flaw. Everyone has them, but I couldn't figure out what her's was. As I wrote Jesse's POV, I found that she was far too motherly. Jesse already had a mom, she didn't need another one. Even after their mom died in Jesse's first draft, Angela was trying to fill that role--which there was now space to fill, Angela felt she was doing the right thing. But even that didn't feel right.
Things have changed. I'm writing it here because I feel no one really ever looks here anymore--it's not like I update things all that often and it's really just been for myself--and it is here because it needs to be written down somewhere and I'd loose it if I actually wrote it down on paper.
Changes:
- Angela's mom doesn't die yet. It won't be until much later that she does die(I really need to remember their mom's name... I think it's Lilly. . .But I could be wrong.)
- Jesse and her mom DO get in a car accedent and Airo DOES pick her up after she runs away. Tobias gets in her head and tells her that her mom is dead and that it's all her fault--even though it was the other drivers fault, he was going around the corner too fast in the dark and wasn't paying attention to the road as he changed the CD's in his truck. He tells her she's a horrible person and she should just kill herself. . .or something liket that. probably not kill herself, but she starts thinking suicide--like Cutting Curtis--is a good thing. She starts cutting while she's with Airo.
- OOOOHHH!!! I so the reason why Jessica looks all punk and has her hair dyed all sorts of funky colors is because of the night her mom died. Her mom was on her way to pick Jessica up from some club down the interstate or something that Cole and his band were at (the whole freezing cop thng where they see Greg--not the deer--and she gets saved by Airo there (that's why she gets in his car after the accident)). Her best girl-friend at this point--not the best of people to be hanging around with--pulls her aside before they get there and gives her a complete make over. She stops just short of practically giving her a tattoo. . . Maybe she gives her another ear-piercing. . . ? IDK but she goes all out practically.
At least this part seems to flow better. (Not to mention I still get to keep kicking Greg's butt over and over and over and over again. It's kind of awesome!!)
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Third Try_Gabriel
Chapter 4
Gabriel:
A small, cold finger pokes my nose. My eyes shoot open and I learch forward. The green around me unfamiliar. The growth beneith me is soft, but clings to my hands. It takes my mind a minute to ajust and my memory to return. My little sister Jumps in front of me, a small poof echoes about her as she lands. The air reverberates around her, leaving the wave of the Jump behind. It is sweet to see her smiling face. Any real smile is better than the havok and terror that has followed me around for the past year and a half. None stop blood.
"Oh, don't be sad again, Gabriel!" she says, her smile fading a little, before her balled fists land on her hips. "This is a happy place. My happy place. And there will be no sad places while you're here. That is the only rule. If you don't follow it. . ."
"You'll do what?" I ask, a smile dances behind my words, and I start getting to my feet.
She Jumped just above my head. Gravity pull her down and she lands, dress over my eyes and legs on either one of my shoulders. I sway at the sudden weight, but quickly stablize. The grass hugs onto my boots as if trying to help.
"I'll make you laugh," she giggles. "And as you can see,"--she moves the cloth from my face, allowing me to breathe--"I'm very good at what I do. This is my world and no one can stop me in my world. Not even you, big brother."
"You're world, little sister, is quiet beautiful."
And it really was. There was grass, of a kind, as far as the eye could see. Different shades of green flowed like a river, dancing, changing in the lightest whisp of a breeze. Not three paces away from where I stand with Della on my shoulders is a pool of crystal clear water. It shimmers and the large trees and few animals that I hadn't ever seen before drink from it. A trickling waterfall fed it by way of a little streem that ran on the other side of the oasis. Dusty mountains, a long ways off, encompassed us. The highest peek seemed to stop and flatten, still high above the rest. It almost seems to glow. . .
A deer like creature with black spots dotting his rusty coat and three massive horns walked to the bank and lapped up the refreshing liquid. A red, rabbit sized rodent with a larger tail than it knew what to do with, woddled over and slipped into it, followed quickly by three other much small animals of the same type.
"Oh, look, Gabriel. These are my friends. I've seen them once or twice here, but every time I try to get close enough to touch them, they run. Why do you think that is?"
"Probably because you scare them. You are rather frightening, you know." She start to retaliate, but I stop her with another question. "How did you find this place?"
She smiles above me and Jumps to stand before me. "I can't tell you. It's my secret. If I told you, you could tell other Jumpers. Then it wouldn't be my world."
"I won't tell, I promise. Have you ever known me to break a promise?"
Della thinks it over before shaking her head. "But I'm still not going to tell you." She grabs my arm and suddenly we're gone again. It's like being pulled through a wind tunnel then, without warning, the cord that holds you in place snaps and you fall for the briefest of moments the way Della Jumps. As you land, you land on your feet. When she Jumps with new comers, they tend to be groggy and dizzy, but I have Jumped with her more often than anyone else and I'm used to the thud of landing.
My eyes open again and we are home.
Gabriel:
A small, cold finger pokes my nose. My eyes shoot open and I learch forward. The green around me unfamiliar. The growth beneith me is soft, but clings to my hands. It takes my mind a minute to ajust and my memory to return. My little sister Jumps in front of me, a small poof echoes about her as she lands. The air reverberates around her, leaving the wave of the Jump behind. It is sweet to see her smiling face. Any real smile is better than the havok and terror that has followed me around for the past year and a half. None stop blood.
"Oh, don't be sad again, Gabriel!" she says, her smile fading a little, before her balled fists land on her hips. "This is a happy place. My happy place. And there will be no sad places while you're here. That is the only rule. If you don't follow it. . ."
"You'll do what?" I ask, a smile dances behind my words, and I start getting to my feet.
She Jumped just above my head. Gravity pull her down and she lands, dress over my eyes and legs on either one of my shoulders. I sway at the sudden weight, but quickly stablize. The grass hugs onto my boots as if trying to help.
"I'll make you laugh," she giggles. "And as you can see,"--she moves the cloth from my face, allowing me to breathe--"I'm very good at what I do. This is my world and no one can stop me in my world. Not even you, big brother."
"You're world, little sister, is quiet beautiful."
And it really was. There was grass, of a kind, as far as the eye could see. Different shades of green flowed like a river, dancing, changing in the lightest whisp of a breeze. Not three paces away from where I stand with Della on my shoulders is a pool of crystal clear water. It shimmers and the large trees and few animals that I hadn't ever seen before drink from it. A trickling waterfall fed it by way of a little streem that ran on the other side of the oasis. Dusty mountains, a long ways off, encompassed us. The highest peek seemed to stop and flatten, still high above the rest. It almost seems to glow. . .
A deer like creature with black spots dotting his rusty coat and three massive horns walked to the bank and lapped up the refreshing liquid. A red, rabbit sized rodent with a larger tail than it knew what to do with, woddled over and slipped into it, followed quickly by three other much small animals of the same type.
"Oh, look, Gabriel. These are my friends. I've seen them once or twice here, but every time I try to get close enough to touch them, they run. Why do you think that is?"
"Probably because you scare them. You are rather frightening, you know." She start to retaliate, but I stop her with another question. "How did you find this place?"
She smiles above me and Jumps to stand before me. "I can't tell you. It's my secret. If I told you, you could tell other Jumpers. Then it wouldn't be my world."
"I won't tell, I promise. Have you ever known me to break a promise?"
Della thinks it over before shaking her head. "But I'm still not going to tell you." She grabs my arm and suddenly we're gone again. It's like being pulled through a wind tunnel then, without warning, the cord that holds you in place snaps and you fall for the briefest of moments the way Della Jumps. As you land, you land on your feet. When she Jumps with new comers, they tend to be groggy and dizzy, but I have Jumped with her more often than anyone else and I'm used to the thud of landing.
My eyes open again and we are home.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Cole comes to the rescue. . .
So to pick up from last time. . . From Jessica still.
************
I didn't know where I was going. I didn't even make it to the street before I felt someone wrench my arm almost out of my socket. The beating of my heart was loud in my ears. I whirled around, my hand raised in a fist to give my sister the worst black eye she's ever had. My eyes burned, through tears or hate I didn't know. But as I did so I didn't see the bright red hair that looked like flames that normally came from my sister's head, but the short, black spiked cap of Cole's hair.
I couldn't stop my fist. There was too much momentum behind my swing. But, thankfully, he moves quickly and slid gracefully away from my wild strike and he let go of my arm.
"Oh, my. . ." My hands flew to my mouth. "I'm so sorry."
"I hope you thought I was someone else," he said with a slight smile and rain dripping down his face.
"I. . . I. . ." I couldn't get my words out. Stupid. I'm so stupid. . .
His eyebrow cocked and he took me all in with a quick look. "Are you okay?"
My chin started to quiver and I dropped my gaze, not answering. I could feel my mouth opening, but no sound came out. His hands moved upward even the slightest bit, as if to offer a hug. Without realizing what I was doing, I was in his arms. Tears escaped from my eyes and meshed with the rain that fell. Whether his invitation was intentional or if I over stepped my bounds, I didn't know. But I did feel his arms lightly wrapping around me, his cheek rested gently on my head, and his hands ran up and down my spine comfortingly.
I didn't know what I was doing. After the night before, I should have been running for the hills. After the dark, I should have kneed him and sprinted back to the police station. But I just needed to be held. It didn't matter if he'd tried something before, it didn't matter if I hardly knew him. I needed someone. I needed to be cared about and felt like I was loved for even a brief moment. I knew he would probably leave and I would continue running, running from everyone and everything that I knew. But for that moment, I didn't want to be alone.
Then he did something I didn't expect.
"Come on. Do you want something to eat?"
Without an answer on my part, he escorted me to his car, the black one at the back of the parking lot. He opened the door and I slid inside. The seat was cold, but dry. It smelt like it had before. The leather was soft under my wet clothes. I wipped my face dry, and cleaned off the little bit of make up I had. Cole got in next to me and reved his engine.
He drove out of the parking lot and down the road to a fast food resturant that was close by. I could tell he was looking me over closely again, his eyes ever scanning me up and down.
"Do you want to go in or take it somewhere else?" he asked politely.
I glared at the building. I didn't want to be around people. He got the message without me saying anything again and pulled to the drive through. Before long, Cole handed me a soft drink, which I sipped without tasting, and we drove out. We went without speaking for a while before he shifted in his seat to get something out of his pocket.
"Here." He plopped something heavy into my lap and let his hand slide again onto the gear shift in the center console. It was my cell phone. "It must have fallen out of your pocket when you were getting out of the car last night. Some girl called. . . Ah, Kaycee? I think her name was. What?"
My eyes started filling with water again.
"What did I say?"
"It's nothing," I whisper. The words barely come out even then. "Don't. . ." Don't worry about it. Just let me alone. . . NO! Don't let me alone. Please to leave me. . .
He pulls the car over to the side of the road. The rain has let up slightly but there is still a light tapping on the roof of the car. "No, there's something wrong. Will you please tell me?"
This is such a change for him. Why am I near him? I ask myself. After hurting me. . . like he did last night. Scaring me and letting me run like that and not coming after me to apologize? Why did I hug him. . . ? Why does everyone else hate me. . . ? Why did she say those things. . . ? Am I really horrible? Awful? I am. I'm nothing. I'm indecent. I'm awful and horrible and I shouldn't even be here anymore. I shouldn't be sitting here. With him. I should be. . . My own thoughts trail off.
"You should be what?" he asks, his voice soft as velvet and so close to my ear.
I shrink away and he looks me deeply in the eyes. He wasn't supposed to hear that.
************
I didn't know where I was going. I didn't even make it to the street before I felt someone wrench my arm almost out of my socket. The beating of my heart was loud in my ears. I whirled around, my hand raised in a fist to give my sister the worst black eye she's ever had. My eyes burned, through tears or hate I didn't know. But as I did so I didn't see the bright red hair that looked like flames that normally came from my sister's head, but the short, black spiked cap of Cole's hair.
I couldn't stop my fist. There was too much momentum behind my swing. But, thankfully, he moves quickly and slid gracefully away from my wild strike and he let go of my arm.
"Oh, my. . ." My hands flew to my mouth. "I'm so sorry."
"I hope you thought I was someone else," he said with a slight smile and rain dripping down his face.
"I. . . I. . ." I couldn't get my words out. Stupid. I'm so stupid. . .
His eyebrow cocked and he took me all in with a quick look. "Are you okay?"
My chin started to quiver and I dropped my gaze, not answering. I could feel my mouth opening, but no sound came out. His hands moved upward even the slightest bit, as if to offer a hug. Without realizing what I was doing, I was in his arms. Tears escaped from my eyes and meshed with the rain that fell. Whether his invitation was intentional or if I over stepped my bounds, I didn't know. But I did feel his arms lightly wrapping around me, his cheek rested gently on my head, and his hands ran up and down my spine comfortingly.
I didn't know what I was doing. After the night before, I should have been running for the hills. After the dark, I should have kneed him and sprinted back to the police station. But I just needed to be held. It didn't matter if he'd tried something before, it didn't matter if I hardly knew him. I needed someone. I needed to be cared about and felt like I was loved for even a brief moment. I knew he would probably leave and I would continue running, running from everyone and everything that I knew. But for that moment, I didn't want to be alone.
Then he did something I didn't expect.
"Come on. Do you want something to eat?"
Without an answer on my part, he escorted me to his car, the black one at the back of the parking lot. He opened the door and I slid inside. The seat was cold, but dry. It smelt like it had before. The leather was soft under my wet clothes. I wipped my face dry, and cleaned off the little bit of make up I had. Cole got in next to me and reved his engine.
He drove out of the parking lot and down the road to a fast food resturant that was close by. I could tell he was looking me over closely again, his eyes ever scanning me up and down.
"Do you want to go in or take it somewhere else?" he asked politely.
I glared at the building. I didn't want to be around people. He got the message without me saying anything again and pulled to the drive through. Before long, Cole handed me a soft drink, which I sipped without tasting, and we drove out. We went without speaking for a while before he shifted in his seat to get something out of his pocket.
"Here." He plopped something heavy into my lap and let his hand slide again onto the gear shift in the center console. It was my cell phone. "It must have fallen out of your pocket when you were getting out of the car last night. Some girl called. . . Ah, Kaycee? I think her name was. What?"
My eyes started filling with water again.
"What did I say?"
"It's nothing," I whisper. The words barely come out even then. "Don't. . ." Don't worry about it. Just let me alone. . . NO! Don't let me alone. Please to leave me. . .
He pulls the car over to the side of the road. The rain has let up slightly but there is still a light tapping on the roof of the car. "No, there's something wrong. Will you please tell me?"
This is such a change for him. Why am I near him? I ask myself. After hurting me. . . like he did last night. Scaring me and letting me run like that and not coming after me to apologize? Why did I hug him. . . ? Why does everyone else hate me. . . ? Why did she say those things. . . ? Am I really horrible? Awful? I am. I'm nothing. I'm indecent. I'm awful and horrible and I shouldn't even be here anymore. I shouldn't be sitting here. With him. I should be. . . My own thoughts trail off.
"You should be what?" he asks, his voice soft as velvet and so close to my ear.
I shrink away and he looks me deeply in the eyes. He wasn't supposed to hear that.
Friday, August 5, 2011
FREAKING MALL SHOT!!!
So I've been trying to write this freaking part in the story for forever! It's turing out to be one of the "roof scenes" as Shelby would put it. I don't know exactly what is going to be said, but I do know that Kaycee will turn into a complete jerk in the process. But then it still doesn't seem right. . . Something isn't right with it. Maybe it. . . wow. . . It's supposed to be written from Airo's point of view. That changes a lot of things.
Alright.
I'll jsut skip it for now. I know that Kaycee is going to make a big deal about hanging out with Jessica for now. Many people around them are going to stare and not know what to do when Kaycee actually explodes on her old best friend. Kaycee tells her that she's a liar--Jessica tells her about her brother and the party and the girl that he was making out with--and that she's worthless and flaky, that she doesn't want to be around people with that kind of image. What kind of image? The kind that screams--her voice raises higher and higher by this point--that "I'm loose! That I'll be pregnant within the year and drop out because I'm no use to the world. I probably won't even keep the baby and have someone beat it out of me because I'm to cheep to have a clinical abortion. You're awful, Jessica. You're not worth my time or anyone elses for that matter. You should just leave and never come back. No one likes to be around liars and hos." She flips her blond hair away from her shoulder so it swings down her back. She's a completely self-righteous doosh.
Airo let Tobias know what was going on, and Tobias ran with it and probably ran with it too long.
Anyway, so here we start from Jessica's point of view after Kaycee started to walk away.
* * * * * * * * * *
I couldn't even watch her walk away. I didn't see how she stroad down the food court like she owned the place. Her heels clicked as she went. The whole room was silent except for her leaving. As soon as she rounded the corner all eyes turned on me. The sizzling of the friers and a small wimper of a child were the only things to be heard. Then my chair. It scrapped as I slid it across the hard green and brown tiles. I felt something warm and wet drip onto my hand as I stood. I didn't look down to see how many tears had fallen onto the table.
Without much more of a warning to the people in my path, I spinted to the closest door, my hands covering my eyes as I did so. All got out of my way but a small group of teenagers, probably a little older than myself. The girl standing between the two boys yelped as I plowed into her. Her bags fell to the ground. One of the boys grabbed for my arm, but my hand slipped from his and I ran past him.
My ears roared and my eyes were clouded with tears. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't think. I just ran out the door and toward the road as her words echoed though my head. The hate was still there. The fiery, burning resentment. My feet hit the pavement until I couldn't hear them under the pounding rain.
The noise around me was all but consumed by the rain and her words. Loose. . . Drop out. . . Awful. . . Liar. . . Drop out. . . Awful. . . Loose. . . Liar. . . Awful. . . I passed stop lights, houses, cars, fenses. . . so many thing, all without seeing them.
My knees gave way and I found myself laying on something soft, mostly. There was something pointy in my hip and my arm was pinned under my own body. My fingers started to tingle. The rain fell on me like waves lapping over me, drawing me deeper and deeper into the water. If I was going to drown, let it be now. Get it over with. . . Please. . .
*****
The next thing I knew it was warm. Warm lips move away from my hand and the man standing in front of me bowed. He was tall; with an almost olive complection from spending too much time out in the sun; his eyes wer alight and full of life; a large, crooked nose that looked as if to have been broken more than once sat above full lips that smlied. "Take care of yourself, alright? If you ever need anything" he passed me a card "don't hesitate to call." He winked and glidded down a stark white hall and quickly ducked around a corner.
I blinked after the older. . . well, gentleman that had just disappered. He wasn't ancient and covered in wrinkles as I'd expect someone to have acted like that to be, but he was quiet a few years older than me. Maybe a few years older than Gabriel.
I felt my face fall.
My hand slid under the blanket and hid the card he had given me, which I hadn't even had the chance to look at, and looked away from the corner as my sister sprinted into view.
This is not what I need right now! I screamed in my head and started to stand. The blanket that was wrapped around my shoulders nearly fell to the floor as I stood and started to move down the opposite hall my sister was coming from.
"Well, excuse me for coming all the way over here to bail you out of jail!" Angela yelled, her hands must have flown to her hip that was cocked to one side. I didn't even need to see her to know what she looked like. It seems like she pulled that pose more often than not when she was talking to me.
I took my first look around the building I was standing in. It didn't look like a jail. It didn't even look like a childrens hospital. No hard, metal bars; but also no dainty little pictures of ponies either. It was a paisty white hall from ceiling to floor tile that carried little to no decorations. The only other person down this hall was a rather solitary looking boy sitting in a chair that was bolted to the ground, his wrists in handcuffs. He had scars running up and down his arms and a very sad look on his face. His eyes were dark and lonely. His blond hair messy, almost dirty.
"I really don't think those are nessicary, sir," a cop said as he left the room next to the chair.
"It's nessisary if I say it is. He's my son and I know how to handle him." This man was gruff, with dark brown hair that probably would have been a completely different shade if he'd washed the oil out of it. He wore a wife beater and dirty, baggy jeans that was barely being held up by the whisp of a belt under a rather large beer belly.
The cop, with a lean and wirey frame, looked sadly down at the boy with suicide marks down his arm and spoke to the man. "Well, he's ready to be taken home now, sir."
"I'll say it is." The father grabbed swiftly at his son as soon as the father's handcuffs were off the boy--who was my age--and hauled him down the hall toward me by the nap of his neck. When the coller of his shirt moved, the rope marks were easier to see where the shadows of his scruff didn't shild them. These where new.
His eyes wouldn't stop staring at me, even after they passed me. Curtis. That was his name. Curtis. He was known all around school for being a cutter, for not even being ashamed for his scars. The story was that even the best concelor in the state couldn't help him. He wouldn't open up to anyone. No one wanted to be his friend after what was said he did to his other friends before he moved from Oregon down here to California. About, why his mom isn't there. . . There were some very strange stories about his mom: that she was a dancer in Vegas, she ran off with her therapist, that while they were hiking as a family his dad pushed her off a cliff, that she committed suicide and drove her car off a dock, or Curtis threw her into a revine after she tried to fix his hair for prom. No one knows, but then again everyone knows some truth.
But no one knows for sure or is even willing to ask.
Cutting Curtis Moore's dad pulled him away hard and around the corner. I followed them until they were out of sight and my sister came around the corner with Gabriel.
I should have made my escape sooner, I thought and turned down the hall again to where Curtis had sat before.
"Wait just a minute!"
The cop from before came out just then to see why my sister was screaming. Her red hair probably flowing galently behind her to make her seem like the good guy. And it worked. He stopped me with an outstretched hand as I was about to slip past him.
"Hold on there," he said and tried to pass a smile.
I glowered at him and tried to shake him off. His grip tightened and wouldn't let me go.
My sister caught up to us then. "What do you think you're doing? Dad is worried sick and Mom is frantic. If they were down here now they'd rip you a new one."
The cop at my arm looked at my sister with a cocked eye. I could see the words floating across his face: Not another one of those families. . .
Angela didn't catch it. "I had to beg them to let us come down here so then they wouldn't make a scene."
"And you're doing such a good job at keeping this quiet aren't you? Leave me alone, Angela." I shook off the cop and he released me this time.
"No, you're coming home, now."
"What if I don't wanna come home 'now'? What if I wanna go and hang out with friends or something?"
She scoffed at me. "Yeah, right." I glared at her trying to mask the hurt that just coursed through me.
"Get away from me. My day has been--" I almost swore there, but stopped myself. I hated those words. The fact that I almost did so just then meant it had been a really bad day. "Just stay away."
The tears started to gather in my eyes again. I turned and sprinted away down the hall, around the corner and toward the exit on the otherside of the building. She doesn't understand, I know she doesn't. She doesn't even wanna try. All she wants is to order me around and scream at me.
I reached the door before my sister could come after me. The rain had stopped outside, but in my heart it could stay thundering for months to come.
***********
Alright.
I'll jsut skip it for now. I know that Kaycee is going to make a big deal about hanging out with Jessica for now. Many people around them are going to stare and not know what to do when Kaycee actually explodes on her old best friend. Kaycee tells her that she's a liar--Jessica tells her about her brother and the party and the girl that he was making out with--and that she's worthless and flaky, that she doesn't want to be around people with that kind of image. What kind of image? The kind that screams--her voice raises higher and higher by this point--that "I'm loose! That I'll be pregnant within the year and drop out because I'm no use to the world. I probably won't even keep the baby and have someone beat it out of me because I'm to cheep to have a clinical abortion. You're awful, Jessica. You're not worth my time or anyone elses for that matter. You should just leave and never come back. No one likes to be around liars and hos." She flips her blond hair away from her shoulder so it swings down her back. She's a completely self-righteous doosh.
Airo let Tobias know what was going on, and Tobias ran with it and probably ran with it too long.
Anyway, so here we start from Jessica's point of view after Kaycee started to walk away.
* * * * * * * * * *
I couldn't even watch her walk away. I didn't see how she stroad down the food court like she owned the place. Her heels clicked as she went. The whole room was silent except for her leaving. As soon as she rounded the corner all eyes turned on me. The sizzling of the friers and a small wimper of a child were the only things to be heard. Then my chair. It scrapped as I slid it across the hard green and brown tiles. I felt something warm and wet drip onto my hand as I stood. I didn't look down to see how many tears had fallen onto the table.
Without much more of a warning to the people in my path, I spinted to the closest door, my hands covering my eyes as I did so. All got out of my way but a small group of teenagers, probably a little older than myself. The girl standing between the two boys yelped as I plowed into her. Her bags fell to the ground. One of the boys grabbed for my arm, but my hand slipped from his and I ran past him.
My ears roared and my eyes were clouded with tears. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't think. I just ran out the door and toward the road as her words echoed though my head. The hate was still there. The fiery, burning resentment. My feet hit the pavement until I couldn't hear them under the pounding rain.
The noise around me was all but consumed by the rain and her words. Loose. . . Drop out. . . Awful. . . Liar. . . Drop out. . . Awful. . . Loose. . . Liar. . . Awful. . . I passed stop lights, houses, cars, fenses. . . so many thing, all without seeing them.
My knees gave way and I found myself laying on something soft, mostly. There was something pointy in my hip and my arm was pinned under my own body. My fingers started to tingle. The rain fell on me like waves lapping over me, drawing me deeper and deeper into the water. If I was going to drown, let it be now. Get it over with. . . Please. . .
*****
The next thing I knew it was warm. Warm lips move away from my hand and the man standing in front of me bowed. He was tall; with an almost olive complection from spending too much time out in the sun; his eyes wer alight and full of life; a large, crooked nose that looked as if to have been broken more than once sat above full lips that smlied. "Take care of yourself, alright? If you ever need anything" he passed me a card "don't hesitate to call." He winked and glidded down a stark white hall and quickly ducked around a corner.
I blinked after the older. . . well, gentleman that had just disappered. He wasn't ancient and covered in wrinkles as I'd expect someone to have acted like that to be, but he was quiet a few years older than me. Maybe a few years older than Gabriel.
I felt my face fall.
My hand slid under the blanket and hid the card he had given me, which I hadn't even had the chance to look at, and looked away from the corner as my sister sprinted into view.
This is not what I need right now! I screamed in my head and started to stand. The blanket that was wrapped around my shoulders nearly fell to the floor as I stood and started to move down the opposite hall my sister was coming from.
"Well, excuse me for coming all the way over here to bail you out of jail!" Angela yelled, her hands must have flown to her hip that was cocked to one side. I didn't even need to see her to know what she looked like. It seems like she pulled that pose more often than not when she was talking to me.
I took my first look around the building I was standing in. It didn't look like a jail. It didn't even look like a childrens hospital. No hard, metal bars; but also no dainty little pictures of ponies either. It was a paisty white hall from ceiling to floor tile that carried little to no decorations. The only other person down this hall was a rather solitary looking boy sitting in a chair that was bolted to the ground, his wrists in handcuffs. He had scars running up and down his arms and a very sad look on his face. His eyes were dark and lonely. His blond hair messy, almost dirty.
"I really don't think those are nessicary, sir," a cop said as he left the room next to the chair.
"It's nessisary if I say it is. He's my son and I know how to handle him." This man was gruff, with dark brown hair that probably would have been a completely different shade if he'd washed the oil out of it. He wore a wife beater and dirty, baggy jeans that was barely being held up by the whisp of a belt under a rather large beer belly.
The cop, with a lean and wirey frame, looked sadly down at the boy with suicide marks down his arm and spoke to the man. "Well, he's ready to be taken home now, sir."
"I'll say it is." The father grabbed swiftly at his son as soon as the father's handcuffs were off the boy--who was my age--and hauled him down the hall toward me by the nap of his neck. When the coller of his shirt moved, the rope marks were easier to see where the shadows of his scruff didn't shild them. These where new.
His eyes wouldn't stop staring at me, even after they passed me. Curtis. That was his name. Curtis. He was known all around school for being a cutter, for not even being ashamed for his scars. The story was that even the best concelor in the state couldn't help him. He wouldn't open up to anyone. No one wanted to be his friend after what was said he did to his other friends before he moved from Oregon down here to California. About, why his mom isn't there. . . There were some very strange stories about his mom: that she was a dancer in Vegas, she ran off with her therapist, that while they were hiking as a family his dad pushed her off a cliff, that she committed suicide and drove her car off a dock, or Curtis threw her into a revine after she tried to fix his hair for prom. No one knows, but then again everyone knows some truth.
But no one knows for sure or is even willing to ask.
Cutting Curtis Moore's dad pulled him away hard and around the corner. I followed them until they were out of sight and my sister came around the corner with Gabriel.
I should have made my escape sooner, I thought and turned down the hall again to where Curtis had sat before.
"Wait just a minute!"
The cop from before came out just then to see why my sister was screaming. Her red hair probably flowing galently behind her to make her seem like the good guy. And it worked. He stopped me with an outstretched hand as I was about to slip past him.
"Hold on there," he said and tried to pass a smile.
I glowered at him and tried to shake him off. His grip tightened and wouldn't let me go.
My sister caught up to us then. "What do you think you're doing? Dad is worried sick and Mom is frantic. If they were down here now they'd rip you a new one."
The cop at my arm looked at my sister with a cocked eye. I could see the words floating across his face: Not another one of those families. . .
Angela didn't catch it. "I had to beg them to let us come down here so then they wouldn't make a scene."
"And you're doing such a good job at keeping this quiet aren't you? Leave me alone, Angela." I shook off the cop and he released me this time.
"No, you're coming home, now."
"What if I don't wanna come home 'now'? What if I wanna go and hang out with friends or something?"
She scoffed at me. "Yeah, right." I glared at her trying to mask the hurt that just coursed through me.
"Get away from me. My day has been--" I almost swore there, but stopped myself. I hated those words. The fact that I almost did so just then meant it had been a really bad day. "Just stay away."
The tears started to gather in my eyes again. I turned and sprinted away down the hall, around the corner and toward the exit on the otherside of the building. She doesn't understand, I know she doesn't. She doesn't even wanna try. All she wants is to order me around and scream at me.
I reached the door before my sister could come after me. The rain had stopped outside, but in my heart it could stay thundering for months to come.
***********
Saturday, July 30, 2011
A weird, strange, and downright creepy dream
So last night, I had a really scary dream. It didn't start out bad at all, but as the time moved on, it got worse and worse.
It started out with a bunch of friends gathering together to watch a movie. We went out and got food for it and met at this modest looking house. I don't remember any kind of movie actually being played, but we all had a great time. My husband-to-be had to drive home or something so I walked him to his car and, after a few minutes, he left. I went back into the house--jumping over a few people that seemed to be asleep on the ground but I got this feeling that they were still watching me, almost waiting to pounce--to clean up the mess everyone had made now that they were all gone.
The strange thing is, when I got there the room was filled with smoke and I could smell the pot that this big group was smoking. I noticed that one of the girls that I'd jumped over on my way there and as high as a kite. I walked through the clouds of smoke and to the back room, there was some big guy behind me who was blocking the door. As I walked to the back, I chose the wrong door and found myself in a closet and the big guy behind me before had followed me there. I excused myself and started making my way around him, ducking my head to not meet his gaze as I did so.
I got just past him when he threw an arm around my neck, half choking me--I don't think he meant to hurt me, although he could have been high or. . . actually he seemed very coherent--and his other hand slid under my shirt and around my waist. His words were eerie as he whispered in my ear, "Do you wanna go have sex in the bedroom?"
Instantly I said, "No," rather forcefully and tried to get away.
"How about on the couch or on the floor?"
My reply was the same only so much more scared. I tried to get away and he held me back until I got my chin under his arm that was around my neck, it hung a bit loose, and bit down hard. He let go and I started sprinting away. I ran though the house, over people, but I couldn't find the exit. I ran into him twice and the girl I'd jumped over before had grabbed me. They were all screaming at me trying to get me back into the smoke.
Finally, after a lot of trying and almost crying out of fear, I got out of the house. I ran to the place where I'd dropped off my husband-to-be and started sprinting away. Just away. I didn't know where I was going, I just needed to get away. I kept running.
Then I woke to my roommate laughing and typing hard on her computer. I don't think she slept at all last night. At least she kept her earphones in, although that doesn't help much in the mood of the room. Even if I can't hear it, the mood gets dark.
It started out with a bunch of friends gathering together to watch a movie. We went out and got food for it and met at this modest looking house. I don't remember any kind of movie actually being played, but we all had a great time. My husband-to-be had to drive home or something so I walked him to his car and, after a few minutes, he left. I went back into the house--jumping over a few people that seemed to be asleep on the ground but I got this feeling that they were still watching me, almost waiting to pounce--to clean up the mess everyone had made now that they were all gone.
The strange thing is, when I got there the room was filled with smoke and I could smell the pot that this big group was smoking. I noticed that one of the girls that I'd jumped over on my way there and as high as a kite. I walked through the clouds of smoke and to the back room, there was some big guy behind me who was blocking the door. As I walked to the back, I chose the wrong door and found myself in a closet and the big guy behind me before had followed me there. I excused myself and started making my way around him, ducking my head to not meet his gaze as I did so.
I got just past him when he threw an arm around my neck, half choking me--I don't think he meant to hurt me, although he could have been high or. . . actually he seemed very coherent--and his other hand slid under my shirt and around my waist. His words were eerie as he whispered in my ear, "Do you wanna go have sex in the bedroom?"
Instantly I said, "No," rather forcefully and tried to get away.
"How about on the couch or on the floor?"
My reply was the same only so much more scared. I tried to get away and he held me back until I got my chin under his arm that was around my neck, it hung a bit loose, and bit down hard. He let go and I started sprinting away. I ran though the house, over people, but I couldn't find the exit. I ran into him twice and the girl I'd jumped over before had grabbed me. They were all screaming at me trying to get me back into the smoke.
Finally, after a lot of trying and almost crying out of fear, I got out of the house. I ran to the place where I'd dropped off my husband-to-be and started sprinting away. Just away. I didn't know where I was going, I just needed to get away. I kept running.
Then I woke to my roommate laughing and typing hard on her computer. I don't think she slept at all last night. At least she kept her earphones in, although that doesn't help much in the mood of the room. Even if I can't hear it, the mood gets dark.
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